Biting

At least once a week, Mason is getting bit at daycare. Sometimes two or three times a week, or like yesterday, twice in one day.

The first two weeks it happened, they told me that it was pretty common – the “older” (up to 24 months) kids like to pick on the smallest kids and generally when a new kid starts, that’s where the focus goes to. I jokingly said “Well, at least his buddy A won’t be getting bit anymore!” A has always been a small fry and is probably still Mason’s size and he’s 17 months old. I just figured we’d stick it out until the next kid came along and then Mason wouldn’t be the target anymore.

Yesterday, I came to pick him up and he had TWO incident reports. First he and another kid were playing on the slide and the other kid bit Mason’s hand. I get that, they’re playing, the other kid probably got frustrated, whatever, they’re little kids. But the other report? It said that Mason was sitting with the other kids listening to the teacher read a story and a kid came up behind him and bit him in the arm. He was just sitting there. That makes me so sad :o(

Through a bit of conversation, the teacher said something that made it sound like it was A who had bit him yesterday and that made me sad. It means that A learned to bite other kids from always getting bit himself and leads me to believe that Mason is probably going to pick up the same bad behavior. And it makes me sad to think that Mason use to think the world of A and now he’s being “attacked” by him. I’m probably thinking too much into it since Mason isn’t cowering in a corner or scared to go to daycare or anything, but still….*sigh*

The daycare is doing what they can to prevent biting and discourage it and most of the reports say “just couldn’t get across the room fast enough to prevent it” so it’s not like they’re turning a blind eye to it. Later this month, another kid should move up from the nursery so Mason hopefully won’t be the target anymore, but NOW I’m dreading when he becomes the biter.

So, any advice, experience, etc with little kids being the (repeated) victim of biting or being the biter? Just a phase right? I’d love to hear your experiences :o)

 

PS – We go for another helmet evaluation this afternoon. Lots of good thoughts please!!

8 thoughts on “Biting

  1. Rici Post author

    I understand where you are at. I have a 15 month old who has had 5 incident reports in the last month or so. 2 have been biting incidents (her being biten) and the other 3 have been her being hit for no reason (the teacher said this, it’s not mommy saying “I have a perfect child”, lol). It hasn’t escalated to the point you’re situation has but I understand the frustration. I know it’s a phase they go through, etc but it doesn’t make it easier on us or them.
    I have made sure it wasn’t the same child biting Teagan. If that becomes the case then we’ll handle it differently. Right now, I don’t feel like I can do much about it as much as it breaks my heart.

  2. WTH am I Doing Post author

    Hopped over from Twitter. 🙂

    I never really had much of a biting issue with my son, mostly, I think, because he was alone with a babysitter thru the typical biting years. However, I did witness a biting incident at his current daycare & I thought how they handled it was interesting…& I filed it away for potential future use.

    The teacher told the kid who was a problem biter that he had to bite himself as hard as he bit the other kid. That way he would understand that it hurt & it wasn’t OK to do that to someone else. I think some might object to this approach, but I think it was a good way to get through to the kid.

  3. Jennie Post author

    Poor Mason! You hate to think of anyone (even little munchkins) hurting your son! John was a biter when he was teething… luckily, he was at home with me, so instead of sad toddler friends, I had black and blue shoulders. I hope they leave Mason alone soon… and good luck at his appointment!!!

  4. Kerry McCullough Post author

    Oh no, that is so sad! It’s especially hard because Mason is too young for you to even expect him to respond or handle it in a certain way. He can’t really express his feelings or defend himself at this age. I hope the teachers jump in quickly- I guess that’s all they can do. I would probably talk to him about it when you get home every day– even though he can’t respond, he can still understand. And that’s important if you want to teach him that it’s not ok to bite, ya know? Good luck!

  5. Kassandra Post author

    I never had this problem with Nick. We have been lucky enough for me to stay home with him. He got his teeth pretty earlier and wasn’t interested in his cousins or me, thankfully. My mom said with us, she’d lightly bite us back to get the point across that it hurts. I know a lot of parents that do that. This is kind of different, considering it isn’t your kid biting. I’m not sure, but I hope it stops.. poor little guy! Good luck at your appt!

  6. Cole Post author

    I’ve had this post open for a while because I wanted to comment, but I didn’t know how to formulate a response. I guess it’s good that the teachers are aware of the situation and try to prevent these problems, but it seems really excessive; he’s getting bitten multiple times a week?! I’m glad Mason seems to be taking it in stride, but that sucks…

  7. Sarah Post author

    Dustyn used to get bit, then he started biting. He didn’t bite often. Only when he got frustrated and not being able to tell the kid what they want.

  8. Allie Post author

    They have a policy at SH’s preschool where if you bite more than twice, you get kicked out. Luckily she has not been bit yet but I have always feared that if she was when she was younger, then she would pick up on the behavior.

    And then there’s Cameron who is a biter when he’s excited. Autism is just so much fun. NOT.

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